Today is one of those days you know is coming, it happens every year, thats the way the days work but because of a twist of fate years ago, it becomes a day you can not let vanish from memory. They say time heals all wounds but I am not sure how accurate that statement is, especially when the vent in question is the death of a child. My god-daughter is eighteen years dead today, if she had not left us. This year she would have graduated high school, would have been starting university in September, she would have I am sure had a boyfriend, like with any life cut short the would have’s are endless. Unfortunately due to what ever cosmic bump that occurred in the universe she was only with us for sixteen days, what I recall most is how small she was, her skin alabaster in quality, she had a fragility that made her more precious. All I remember of her christening is the beep of her heart monitor and the nurses on a knife edge every time it bleeped the wrong way. Although a joyful occasion one tinged with sadness as we knew her life would be a short one. The funeral was simple, quite, dignified, a small white coffin laid to rest in the freshly turned earth, the world around reflecting the solemnness of the occasion. The death of a child is difficult event for a parent to understand and cope with, for with each passing year you are reminded of what your child will not achieve and the pain of the loss becomes ever more poignant. Although a sad day, I do believe she is keeping a watchful eye over her younger siblings, making her presence felt, and helping to guide them safely through life’s challenges. Although she is gone I do have the privilege of fulfilling my duties, although a tad chaotically at times, I am the one who fills them full of sweets and hands them back or when babysitting, bedtime tends to be two seconds before parents come home, not the best role model to two boys. But love them both and I hope they both have long and full filling lives, full of love, mischief and wonder.
to two boys,